Reflections

It's been a few months since I've written. Tomorrow we hit the 1 year mark of life changing as we knew it. Up until that point it was all fun and games. We all went to work/school on March 13th, and by that afternoon we were told that schools would be closed for the next 2 weeks. Those first couple of weeks were fine because we knew this was just to "slow the curve". We laughed at phrases such as "social distancing" and "mask up". We wondered how in the world people were going to be distanced? We scoffed at stores making aisles one way...and to be honest I still scoff at that one. Let's not forget that people turned into toilet paper hoarders and left the rest of us hoping we wouldn't have to resort to Kleenex. 

After the first week, the governor decided to shut the state down for the next 2 or 3 weeks, thus beginning the "stay at home order". How strange to hear that only one person in your family should go into a store. Masks were encouraged (and there was no way in heck I was donning one of those), restaurants closed down, small businesses had to close, and playgrounds were closed off with caution tape and snow fencing. 

I never expected this to be something that continued for months on end. My birthday was in "quarantine", and I missed my trip to California. My preschoolers didn't get a proper ending to their school year (although I was thankfully able to give them a graduation). Daniel didn't get to finish 2nd grade or say goodbye to his school and friends. Schools didn't reopen in August like we all thought would happen (because Covid would be gone by then). Mask wearing became the norm. To this day I still don't like it, but I will respect the signs on doors and wear them when required. 

While I can say this this past year has sucked in so many ways, I suppose some good came out of it. It showed me that I really do have strength. I was stuck. Feeling trapped. I was scared and uncertain. Not because of a fear of a virus, but because it forced us into being home. It helped me gather the courage to say, "I can't do this anymore. Something has to change." I took control of my life, and started over. It was scary, but thrilling. I don't know if I would have had the courage had I not been forced into a situation I had no control over.

I was dreading March 13th. Even last week, it felt like this impending doom. As I've sat and reflected this week though, I'm looking at tomorrow with hope. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have faith that things are going to change for the better. Slowly, but surely we are getting there.

Stay tuned tomorrow for my thoughts on moving forward and not living in fear!