A Rocky Road

I don't even know where to start without making this into a novel!

The past few weeks have been interesting to say the least. 2 weeks after my first hospital stay, I was admitted once again. Only this time it wasn't overnight. It was 3 nights. To make a very long story short, I was finally diagnosed with Partial Placenta Previa. I never thought I'd be talking about placenta so much in my life! Basically, they had thought that it had completely moved after it was checked around 25 weeks. It wasn't caught again when I was admitted the first time either. Thankfully the doctor that I saw on my second stay, decided that once again when they couldn't see the cause of anything doing a regular ultrasound, that we should try a transvaginal ultrasound. In between the two I was telling Jacob how frustrated I was, because this always happens to me! No one can ever tell me what's wrong even though there clearly IS something wrong. After they did the other ultrasound it was discovered that it hadn't moved like they thought. Finally. An actual reason!

The stay wasn't awful, but it wasn't great either. I had wonderful nurses again. Jacob would come up and visit me. My in-laws were amazing and each took a turn coming over to watch Daniel. Jacob did a great job taking care of Daniel in the evenings and all day Saturday. They even came up to see me and went on a Daddy/Son adventure. I was sick of the food. It was depressing every time I had to do continuous monitoring, but quickly gained the privilege of unhooking and re-hooking myself back up so I didn't need to call a nurse in every time I had to pee. James was always moving like crazy, but I was also having lots of sporadic contractions as well.

I had about 7 tubes of blood drawn. Another Rogham shot. An IV line. Plus 2 steroid shots to develop James' lungs in case we had to do an emergency delivery. It's a little scary signing consent papers for them to do an emergency c-section if needed. It was mostly precaution, but scary none the less. As is stands, if my placenta doesn't move I'll be having a c-section...something I don't want.

We also made the difficult decision to send Daniel to Iowa for an undetermined amount of time, because I was basically told to rest and do nothing when I got released. We just couldn't see how I would be able to care for him alone during the day, and my mom had already spent and week over here helping me after my first stay. She and Kendra came Sunday and left Monday.

I cried. A lot. I cried as I rocked him to sleep the night before. I cried recording a story for him to take along. I cried when he gave me a random hug. And I sobbed my eyes out as I watched them drive away. Then I came inside and prayed. And sobbed. And curled up in the fetal position with one of his blankets. The next few days were bizarre. It still is, but the relaxing without a crazy almost 3 year old has been amazing. We bought a web cam so we Skype 2 times a day. He CLEARLY misses us. (Please note my sarcasm.). Half the time he just runs away. It's bittersweet, because I want him to miss me, but I'm so so happy at how easily he adjusted to life at Mimi and Pa's house!

At my appointment last Thursday I had an ultrasound done and nothing had changed, but my OB encouraged me to start doing a little more to see how my body would handle it. I took it upon myself to take a long leisurely trip to Target, and it was glorious.

We decided over the weekend that my mom would bring Daniel home Friday (tomorrow!), and she's going to stay until Tuesday to see how I can handle it. Is it weird that I'm nervous? I'm excited to see him, but I know what a handful he is. Everyone keeps asking, "Are you sure you'll be able to handle it? Are you prepared to send him back with your mom?" Nope. Don't know if I can handle it. Especially between yesterday and today. I don't think I'm having real contractions, but, I sure am having Braxton Hicks...all the time. I went grocery shopping this morning and between hot flashes, heartburn and BH contractions I felt like death when I got home an hour later.

The "good news" is even if Daniel stays and my mom goes home, I have my next appointment next Friday. If I'm feeling like I can't do it, then we'll head to Iowa after that and stay awhile. Ideally, I want to be here with Jacob and around my doctor and hospital, but I've already talked with my doctor and insurance (and husband, obviously) and my doctor will send records over with me just in case.

It's amazing how one pregnancy can go so smoothly and another can be drastically different. I've made it to 31 weeks (tomorrow), and hope to get as close to 40 as I can. I figure I'll end up overdue. Although, my doctor has said the goal is to make it first to 34 weeks. At that point they will not stop labor. 37 weeks is more ideal. 40 would be excellent.

I won't like though. I wouldn't mind an October baby (mid to late October), but ONLY if he's healthy. So far though, everything has looked great with him. He's growing perfectly...just needs to cook a bit longer. So stay put, James Michael. Mommy still has stuff to get ready!