Last night while we were lying in bed, we enjoyed watching our little boy morph my stomach into different shapes. I've seen him do it before, but not that much! He was all over the place, and then he settled on the left side of my stomach. Jacob loved being able to feel him. We're not sure if it was a leg or his bottom we were feeling, but it was really cool. We'll talk to him at night too, and love it when he kicks back in response. He gets the hiccups a lot now too. Like his mommy, if he gets them once during the day, he's bound to get them a second time too.
I feel bigger today and my stomach has that stretching feeling. No actual stretch marks yet, but I'm sure they'll come. I know I've gotten bigger in the past week because I keep bumping my stomach into things!
I'm starting to have a harder time sleeping now. My body's thermostat is all thrown off. I'm hot all the time at night...and usually I'm the one huddled under the covers while Jacob has 2 fans blowing on us. Now I can hardly stand to stay under the sheet at night. I wake up frequently. Last night wasn't enjoyable. I had a hard time falling asleep and then was up for an hour in the middle of the night.
Usually I can shut my thoughts off when I'm tired enough, but last night it wouldn't stop. I was more or less thinking of the baby. I'm getting so excited, and yet at the same time I have my fears as well.
I'm excited to meet my little man and hold him in my arms. I'm excited to see him in Jacob's arms and watch him bond with him.
I'm scared of labor! I've read up on everything that I can. I've talked to close friends about their birth stories, but in reality I know that every single woman's experience is different. I don't want to get to the hospital too soon when I'm in labor, and yet I'm afraid that I could end up being one of those few women who have their baby in the car if I wait too long. I'm scared of the pain. I'm undecided on the epidural. Some days it sounds like a good idea and other days I want to do it naturally. Then there's the fear of complications or having to get a c-section.
I know these are all completely normal fears. I'm sure almost all women experience them. The rational side of me also knows that labor doesn't last forever and there's a huge reward at the end!
I'm also wondering what to do with his crib. There are a lot of warnings out there about using bumpers in the crib. They're so cute though! I don't understand why bedding sets come with them if you aren't supposed to use them. I want to keep them in, and yet there's this fear nagging at me. If something happened because I chose to leave them in, I would never forgive myself. On the other hand, all 3 of us had bumpers in our cribs and nothing happened to us! Are we just an overly cautious society? Same goes with the blanket that the bedding set comes with. They say you shouldn't use blankets or anything soft in the crib. What am I supposed to do with it? I do plan on purchasing the Angelcare Baby Monitor though for peace of mind. Not only can you hear the baby, it also has a sensor you put under the crib mattress. If it doesn't detect any movement for 20 seconds an alarm will sound on the receiver. That's something that worth the extra money just for peace of mind!
I'm sure in the coming weeks I'll write about more excitement and fears. 68 days until my due date!
You're right, Rachel Mae. All your fears are normal and they will come and go as you get closer to THE day. Definitely get the baby monitor. When Heidi was born we didn't have a monitor and she was in another bedroom. I would often be found on the floor by her crib because I was afraid during the night something would happen. Mike finally moved her crib into our room for awhile. Also, I would definitely have the epidural. :) If you're afraid of the pain, that will certainly help. Can't wait to see your little guy. So excited for you guys! :)
ReplyDeleteI extremely recommend reading the book on the Bradley method. It is SO HELPFUL. Seriously. It will inform you so much on labor and pain and meds and how to let your body do everything that comes naturally. I am so doing the BM this time around. I was a chapter or two in and already loved it.
ReplyDeleteAs for the bumper, you don't need to worry about that until the kid starts rolling. Then it'd be your own personal preference. I was comfortable with it by the time Amelia was rolling and squirming that I didn't remove it. But don't let that fool you into thinking I wasn't a HUGE worry wart about it.
The blanket that's there is seriously more for decorational purposes until the kid is like a year old. Until then, swaddling, then sleepers, them warm footie pajamas. Those will keep him plenty warm.
Hope this helps :)
Just remember, Rachel, there are prayers being said on your behalf ;) love you, Momma
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